Head Long Is it too much of a stretch to get your prospect to read a headline the length of your arm?
By Jerry Fisher
Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.
Typically, good advice on writing advertising headlines is: Theshorter, the better. After all, why smack readers with a longstring of words when it's hard enough getting their attentionwith a short headline? But there are some exceptions to the rule.Especially when the message you think will "sing" to yourtarget market begs dramatization (and if you have the budget for anad big enough to accommodate it). It's a risk, given theimpatience of the average consumer. But sometimes it's a riskworth taking.
That's the case here, in which HealtheTech Inc.,a maker of weight-management products in Golden, Colorado,headlines the lament of the frustrated weight-gainer:"It's not fair. If I even look at food, I gain weight. Andmy sister can eat anything and never put on a pound. Will somebodyplease explain." Whew! Twenty-eight words. End to end, theystretch 2 feet. But it's a set of words that grabs theprospect's attention by strategically highlighting the phrase"gain weight" in orange and placing it at the far right,where it will stick out.
The headline is a setup to explain HealtheTech'smetabolism-measuring device, the BodyGem. By breathing into it,says the manufacturer, you'll get a reading on your metabolicrate and thus know the number of calories you burn on a given day.The figure will let you "finally know how many calories youcan eat and still lose weight."
HealtheTech has a big challenge in not only introducing anunusual product, but also asking readers to take actionimmediately. However, the firm gets an A+ for an effective headlinethat reaches the prospect, followed by a solid explanation of thebenefits. Also, notice the clever use of the oversized captions inthe photos. They serve as subheads and draw your eye to twosupporting messages: "It's not you, it's yourmetabolism" and "A simple breath test can measureyours." Just by reading the headline and the two captions, theprospect gets the essence of the sales pitch and is, hopefully,motivated to read further.
Where a headline is concerned, don't rule out a longer onewhen you've got a powerful message. At the same time, rememberto format it with plenty of surrounding white space. Without thisluxury, the reader would be faced with an inhospitable wall ofwords.
JerryFisher is a freelance advertising copywriter and the authorof Creating Successful Small Business Advertising.
